Trust the French to invent a new kind of perfume, but it comes from the most unlikely of places. Yes, that's right, the British like to say that "you're having a gas" when life is fun, but the French have given a new meaning to this colloquialism.
Christian Poincheval, a 65-year-old inventor who lives in the quaint village of Gesvres and looks like a combination of Santa Claus' and Jerry Garcia, has invented a pill that makes farts smell like chocolate.
Poincheval sells the pills at pilulepet.com for around $12.50 for 60 capsules. His website claims the chocolate pills will "allow the user to fart through to the New Year in grand style."
The pills are merely the latest addition to Poincheval's odorific cache of innovations, which also includes pills that make farts smell like roses or violets, and fart-reducing powder for pets.
As with most new creations, necessity was the mother of this invention. He was eating dinner with friends in 2006 when he realized the group had caused a gas attack at the restaurant.
"Our farts were so smelly after the copious meal, we nearly suffocated," he told the Telegraph. "The people at the table next to us were not happy. Something had to be done."
It was the start of a long period of stinky researching, during which Poincheval made some interesting discoveries.
"When we were vegetarian we noticed that our gas smelt like vegetables, like the odor from a cow pat, but when we started eating meat, the smell of the flatulence became much disagreeable," he said, according to . "We needed to invent something that made them smell nicer."
Poincheval claims his pills not only create chocolate-scented farts, they reduce intestinal gas and bloating thanks to ingredients like vegetable coal, fennel, seaweed, plant resin, bilberry, and cacao zest.
Since people tend to stuff their bellies during the holidays, Poincheval figures his chocolate fart pills should be stuffed in stockings.
"Some buy them because they have problems with flatulence and some buy them as a joke to send to their friends. Christmas always sees a surge in sales," he said, according to .
It seems that Poincheval's inventions will lend a new meaning to the ancient Icelandic proverb, "Every man likes the smell of his own farts."
In a world where farts can smell like roses (or chocolate), nothing is surprising, except perhaps the famous line from Citizen Kane. I'm still a bit puzzled about why the richest newspaper man on earth said "rosebud" as his last word before expiring. Too bad Orson Welles didn't live long enough to buy a bottle of Poincheval's pills and "toot sweet" his way through the holidays.